I saw the news today, oh boy!

Subject:	Call to arms, my bretheren.
Time:	11:27 pm.
Mood:	down.
Music:	Roi - Breeders.

I want to form a new band. I'm really not having it with Mr. Splitfoot. I think the biggest schism is something to the effect of every time I try to lay down a new groove, I get this look like "Okay, but how does that relate to metal?". I'm not a metal guy. I listen to metal bands who people tell me to check out, and I can dig their material... But I'm not about headbanging and cookie monster screaming and societal perversions seeking the flesh of the innocent. I'm not a 7-string drop-D kind of guy.

Christ, I listen to Joe Pass, Larry Carlton, Rush, Tower of Power, Jack Johnson, Billy Joel... You get the idea. I don't know who Dimmu Borgir is, nor do I care. I think I stopped caring after I found out that their lead guitarist's name is "Balsac". Seeing us unplugged would be like seeing Slayer unplugged. I pitched a Pixies song once, and Ryan just looked at me and said "What are you, gay?"

The song I played at the Pops concert (As it may now be officially called) was fun. I was pissed that the name was totally misprinted and made it look 57208723897450287 times more emo than it really was. The word is 'grey'... not 'grave'. It matters. Grey is that area between black and white and you don't quite know which way to go. I hate it when people scream about death and bones and anal rape. I blame Kurt Cobain. What a fucker.

I hate how our music scene is a competition to see who is the most hardcore. Musicianship and Creative merit be damned, let's just see how close to G.G Allin we can get! Fuck that. G.G Allin was a hack. He was no musician, he was a fucking circus performer. I'm going to punch the next person that thinks that Felix Mendelsohn is the lead singer of Rammstein. Please do not get Till Lindermann confused with the 19th century composer who wrote Abendleid. Or, if you do, please eat shit and die. No offense, of course.

I'm tired of all this psuedoextrospective garbage. Yes, we all know Bush is dumb, you can shut the hell up now. No really, we don't want to hear your 'liberal' garbage shouted over a mindless barrage of power chords. Learn to play the guitar, learn how global politics work, then we'll talk... Until then, however, please refrain from doing me the displeasure of bombarding my ears with that convoluted garbage.

I'm also going to punch the next person who labels me as 'liberal' or 'conservative'... I like to think that my politics aren't so simple that they might be surmised in a single word. Just because I hate Bush does not make me a Democrat. Just because I feel like I've lost braincells having borne witness to your lackluster defense of the preceeding statement does not make me a Republican. In fact, both parties can get some petroleum jelly, learn some advanced yoga positions and kindly fuck themselves. No, seriously.

I'm tired of statutes being the law of the land. Yes, I know, by definition, anything statutory IS the law of the land, but think outside the box here. Statutes say that you can rape the willing, that you can rape with your eyes, and that you can have sex without any genetalia becoming involved. ARGH! Fuck statutes! Can't we just appoint competent judiciary officials and call it fucking done? Do we really need to hit people with a $50 fine for spitting on the sidewalks? The British parliment was built on a river of human sewage, and they didn't complain: They just dipped the drapery in ammonia, sat down, and wrote the fucking Magna Carta. Erm, but not in that order, of course.

Kendra's last day is tomorrow. I'm going to miss her alot. I don't know why, either... I mean, it seems like all she ever does is banter with Tara about 'hot boys'... gag me with a bloody spoon. Repeatedly. I'm fucking done with drunk party-rape stories, too. If you die of alcohol poisoning, or get wasted and drive your car off a cliff, you deserve it.

I'm sick of pity competition. I'm sick of, 'oh I'm offended by X remark because Y relative is addicted to Z substance,' to the response of 'oh, well CLOSER relative was addicted to MORE DANGEROUS substance' to the rebuttal of 'Well, I'm going to prattle on with how dreadfully cruel life has been to me until we reach a nadir where nothing further stated can reasonably be believed, and at that point, the person who made the last remark is the veritable winner'

Hardcore. Emo. Goth. Poseur. IndiEAUGH YOU PEOPLE AND YOUR FUCKING BUZZ-WORDS! It's tired and overdone, and really sad that the cavalcade of invented and subjective terms has become such a pervasive topic of universal debate. New rule: If you're debating about what real Punk is, you get sent to a death camp. No if's and's or butt's. I'm aware that I spelt 'but' with an extra 't'.

Communism is lame. Karl Marx had a massive Freudian outpouring and Frederich Engels didn't have the good sense to stop him. The wierd thing is, they were both really rich. Well, Engels was from a REALLY fucking welthy family in Bremen. I don't know about Marx. The sheer ammount of money he made on books like 'The Communist Manifesto' and 'Das Kapital' seems like it surpasses the ammount needed to sustain him. I mean, he just kept spilling forth his political doctorine and publishing it and made fucktons. It doesn't seem like that fits the whole 'Work according to your abilities/recieve according to your needs' spiel.

And Pussy should be banned. If not the thing itself, than at least the word. It must suck to be a cat, under constant comparison to human female genitals. I don't know how it would be possible to outlaw the vagina without dooming the human race, thus it seems the latter is the most appropriate course of action. Everyone write me in as president and I'll start work on it at once. Except you won't, because you're too busy trying to get pussy. Damn it all.

Where is Terra? I need to talk to Terra, but it's early in the morning. I have to be at work by 10, and I get off at whenthefuckever PM or hopetoallahitsnot AM. I hate doubles. Fuck the DaVinci Code, fuck Dan Brown, fuck Tom Hanks, fuck Tucker and anyone who looks like Tucker, and fuck hollywood not being able to do a book justice.

I really think Ross should've taken my guitar at all-state. I don't ever play it anymore. I have to get used to not playing the guitar, because I'm a bass player now. But I hate being a bass player, so I never do that either. That leaves the piano and singing, but people throw things at me when I sing (And I know it's not just a singing in public thing, because people clap for Luke) and I don't have a piano, only a keyboard, and I hate playing the keyboard. I hate composing, because self-righteous know-it-all smarmy bastards tell me that I should've written X passage differently. Fuck that shit.

At any rate, I'll post her stats again: Her name is Rose. She is a 1958 Epiphone Cortez. She is free to anyone who will give her love and attention.

And I hate "band geeks"... they're smarmy, self-righteous pricks. Just because your instrument is shiny and cost more doesn't make you better than me. So there are lots of losers in choir... trust me, there are lots of losers in band, too. I can promise you that I'll be able to play an oboe cadenza before you can howl like a Wagnerian Soprano, so blow me. Okay, so I'm not a Wagnerian Soprano, but I can do the Tenoré parts in Don Giovanni at the requisite dynamic, and I'm a Bass. I was in band once (Twice, actually). It's not all that great.

Put your penises and vaginas in a bag and throw them in the bloody Tiber River. Seriously.

I'm done now.

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